Gilly wrote: Did anyone else hear that?
Musta just been my spirit guide muttering.

feather wrote:
But she's a bitch, remember - don't listen to her.

And now that you've both mad a big fuss over it, Mr Wolf might be miffed that I've even let on that there is something to know -









THAT YOU DON'T KNOW AND I DO HAHHAHAHAHAHA!!!

you're the Biatch

feather wrote:
The who now?

A flesh light is a male sex aid, you lube up, plug yourself in, and away you go Not that I have experienced that of course

Yes, I was reading some reviews for those the other day. According to one bloke they are better than the real thing.

How are you this morning Mr Wolf? Appart from being a sexy beast.

LesleyPumpshaft wrote:
They're not. Not that I would know of course Nothing beats the real thing

I'm fairly tremendous this morning thank you Lesley I hope you're okay too

I've never seen a flesh light in real life, but for some reason the name puts me in mind of some sort of obscene torch.

Got some funny Amazon customer reviews.... Nothing to do with adult toys btw.

www.amazon.co.uk/product-reviews/B002ATI4VG

I've just spunked an obscene amount of money up the wall, shopping online at Sainsbury's. Still, I'm now equipped to feed my teenage son for the next week - if I'm lucky. I also have new, swankey kitchen appliances and accessories on the way. I'm also regretting my moment of online retail weakness.

Appart from this, I feel really shit and depressed at the moment. I literally wish I could just sleep indefinitely.

What's on my mind? WHAT'S ON MY MIND???

Well I'll fucking tell you!!


I have just spent over an hour, a freakin hour, typing the longest PM in the history of the world.


All 3000 fuckin characters!!!


I'm dyslexic (what a shock, eh) and trying to write that much is a harrowing experience for me.


An hour...........3000 characters.......and when I clicked send......the computer logged me out!!!!!!


Message not sent and the sister fucker has dissapeared!!!!


Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Technology, you bastard.


Double fucknicity and mis-shaped tits!!!


PS Arrrrrrrggggggghhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!

Lesley & Hugo - you poor, stressed babes.

Sit down & listen to this, ignoring all religious connotations (unless you wish not to) and just focusing on the sound.

Now my hissy fit has finished, I shall start again.

For those who are unaware a flesh light is a rubber clunge. It is alleged to be better than actual sex but I suspect that such boasts come from fellas who have never experienced the fun to be had with an actual real woman. Bless 'em.
I believe they are responsible for the recent drop in wrist stress injuries seen in local hospitals.

Sorry you're having it tough at the mo, lesley. I know you've been suffering from lack of sleep and I wish I could recomend a way of combating it. I hope the retail thereapy has helped a bit.

Thanks for the vid, Gilly. Sadly, my computer thinks I am in Germany and will not play it. Luckily I have my digi radio at work and have tuned it to Smooth 70s. All was going well until they played Queen which just started off another of my sweary rants. If they don't play some Johhny Bristol soon I can see my stress levels creeping up.

Love and hugs - and maybe a cheeky goose - for everyone.

Are you still a bit nocturnal Lesley? I've found when I'm nocturnal for a while, I start feeling depressed and crap. I don't mind the night time routine as I call it, as long as I'm not in it too long, I need the daylight.

I hope you feel better soon

Those fleshlights must take some cleaning...

Mr. Wolf wrote:
Good point. I suppose you could just pour out the, shall we say, leavings and pop it in the dishwasher.

If I wasn't at work I would have a look on google to find out.

The leavings

Mr. Wolf wrote:


Gentlemen's relish.

Man mayo.

Sack cement.

And the really gross one..................

I'm so, so sorry for those.

I used to call mine 'love cream'

Mr. Wolf wrote:


Gonad goo.

Well I was gonna offer words of condolence to lesley and hugo there but by the time I got to the end all I could do was this

Apologies

psketti wrote:
Hey, it's all the wolfmiester's fault.

I came here to talk about bunnies and rainbow drops.

I blame whoever it was that started this smutty flesh light talk.






Hold on.........oh.......